Ayy Lmao

Everything around me has changed so much - I wish it hadn't though. Where do I even begin?

I miss everything.

I miss the days where I used to go on the Mario kart server and almost everyone there knew me.

I miss the days where I used to go on dodgeball servers and kept practicing and practicing until eventually I met a bunch of wonderful people who were funny and turned out to be great friends.

I miss making friends on rocket jumping servers, too.

I could name over a hundred people that I miss talking to.

I regret so many things.

I've actually gotten to the point where I hate myself for not talking to people that I'd been friends with for so long.

I regret it so bad.

But I can't change it now.

They've all moved on, and some disappeared without a trace.

I don't blame them.

I'm a terrible friend.

I've lost friend upon friend, even a few best friends.

Some I made up with, some I did not.

I feel like such an idiot now for all of the things I did back then.

Many people hate me thanks to the things I did to them.

I didn't mean to do them.

I wish I was able to get all of you to come back so I could apologise to each and every one of you.

But, it's just not possible.

Everyday, I'll wake up, and get hit in the face with a giant hammer with the word 'guilt' written all over it (metaphorically, that is).

I don't know if I'll ever get over what I did to you people.

Most of you probably have forgotten me by now...

But I'll never forget about you.

I deserve this.

I deserve your hatred.

I don't deserve forgiveness.

But that doesn't mean you won't get an apology.

I'm sorry.