These allegations are simply not true

Sir there are rumors going around that you, in fact, diddled Mr. Inkjizzer is this true???

Sir Sir any comments on the recent events concerning Squidson Inkjizzer?

What is happening here

Squidson Inkjizzer should not be arrested whatsoever. He is purely doing what his instincts tell him to. And I think we both know how much the owner of this profile would love to see his dildo slimed up by a squid. Therefore, I think Sir Inkjizzer is doing us a favor.

I have information that could lead to the discovery and arrest of Squidson Inkjizzer.