Last night, I trimmed my ass hair. Felt clean as hell. Took a quick 2-minute shower, completely unaware of what was coming, and passed out like a baby. Woke up in the morning, ran my hand over my ass, and damn, it was smooth. Felt amazing, no lie. Had breakfast, went to uni, finally got there, sat down, and tried to listen to the lecture. But since I spent a couple of hours last night dealing with my hairy situation, I didn’t get much sleep. So, I put my head down on the desk and knocked out.

Woke up like 1-2 hours later, and since I was sleeping in an "L" position, my stomach was all squished up. Felt a fart coming. No big deal, happens all the time. Thought I’d do a little stealth move, lift my right cheek slightly, and let it out nice and quiet. Lifted my cheek… and BOOM. Ten straight seconds of thunder. The whole damn desk was shaking.

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EARL GREY PROFILES

NAME: Jean-Luc Perriwinkle Picard
OCCUPATION: Starship Big Cheese
AGE: 94
BIRTHPLACE: Paris, Terra Sector
EYES: Grey
SKIN: Tanned
HAIR: Not much
LAST MAGAZINE READ:
Lobes 'n' Probes, the Ferengi-Betazoid Sex Quarterly
TEA: Earl Grey. Hot.

EARL GREY NEVER VARIES.

On my planet, to rest is to rest -- to cease using energy. To me, it
is quite illogical to run up and down on green grass, using energy,
instead of saving it.
-- Spock, "Shore Leave", stardate 3025.2
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📕⚡💎👽🏓📗📒🎽🌽🏀🍧🥗🎁🎄🌂
🐟👾😺🥗🌋⛳🐳🎈👃🍆👳👽🌂🎍📕
👑🌏🎫🏓💛💚🐠📀🚘🐊📘💗🐝📗🔋

Additional reputation: homobama

💃🎽🚕 Performance review for mrsotty 🐊📀💎

mrsotty is willing to face physical risks and danger, and appears to do so without fear. Sets an example of bravery that inspires others. When ideas are challenged by others, mrsotty listens to their view and tries to defend a position, but may not yet have the experience or authority to present the case well. Or may be over-aggressive in defending a position. Reaches a decision rapidly after taking account of all likely outcomes and estimating the route most likely to bring success. The decisions almost always turn out to be good ones. Has proved to be trustworthy, but has not yet been given access to material of a highly confidential or sensitive nature.

🏀 + 🐝 = 🌏

+rep

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How did i write nice wrong