Oh, you think your spine is too fragile to handle forces distributed between all 33 vertebrae, so deadlifts are too dangerous? How about putting all 500+lbs on one vertebrae like some kind of DIABOLICAL MEAT JENGA? Literallly 33x the DIRECT SHEERING FORCES trying to pop bone out like a PEZ DISPENSER and yet we're all still here. MATHEMATICS suggests I can SAFELY DEADLIFT 17,490 POUNDS now. You have no damn clue how STRONG your vertebrae are. You know what Jet Fuel can't melt? Rock Hard, STEEL BEINGS. If the Tower of Babel had been the Tower of BACKBONE we would have reached HEAVEN by now and the US would probably have invaded it for NATURAL RESOURCES. If we proposed with BLOODY BONES instead of blood diamonds maybe the divorce rate wouldn't be 120%. The only thing HARDER than your L1-5 is trying to convince your pencilneckass to USE THEM. "Deadliestlift, this is unhinged." NO, it's HIPHINGED and SPINEPILLED, you functional fitwit. 'Functional' is the Great Value of physical ability. It's legally edible Kheesy Spread. It's a D on the report card. It's being told that at least you have a wonderful personality. Its a bare minimum, not a goal, and going forward I never want you to talk to me or my dog ever again.