You know Paris, France? In English, it's pronounced "Paris" but everyone else pronounces it without the "s" sound, like the French do. But with Venezia, everyone pronouces it the English way: "Venice". Like 'The Merchant of Venice' or 'Death in Venice'. WHY, THOUGH!? WHY ISN'T THE TITLE DEATH IN VENEZIA!? ARE YOU ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ KIDDING ME!? IT TAKES PLACE IN ITALY, SO USE THE ITALIAN WORD, DAMMIT! THAT ♥♥♥♥ PISSES ME OFF! BUNCH OF DUMBASSES!

Let's do a Morecambe FC whodunnit. The victim is... Hallam Hope. Interesting. They were last seen with... Les Dewhirst. Very fitting indeed. Harry Burgoyne was arrested... wooooow. David Tutonda found the body- *holds in laughter*. The suspect is... Gerard Garner... interesting. And the person who did it is... Derek Adams... *laughs hard* This is EXACTLY how I wanted this to go.

slay