I think I can help you with that.

What?
You think because I've only played for 2782 hours at the time of writing this review that don't know nothin' eh?

What if I told you that 2782 hours or 27,820 hours isn't going to help you decide.
I guess you'll call me a fool then Huh?

Hmm.. considering you've already made it this far down my review, I think you're curious fella'
So why don't we use that curiosity to help you come to a decision on whether or not you should give this game a better chance than that person you were interested in bout' a year ago.

All right! I see your still with me!
So here's what..
I'm gonna ask you a set of questions.

First I want you to take look the questions below, & memorize them.
– Oh come on now they ain't that hard.
You can't tell me Tiktok reduced your memory to be capable of no more short term retention then the your bladder when it time to piss out your first beer of the night after you shotgun'd 4 in a row trying to impress your buddies at the 10 year high-school reunion.

What did you say you don't drink beer?!
You never even tried one?!
Oh hell nah! I ca—

*Inhales sharply*
Breath Kryptlock just breath..
I know.. They're just a kid, they just ain't developed the acquired taste yet, that's all..

*Thinking*
I better let their daddy know they're at risk of raisin' a invalid if they don't sneak them a beer after dinner one of these nights soon'

Okay, Put down your phone & listen here I'm only gonna say this once!
I want you to sit back in that oddly wide gaming chair of yours, close your eyes and ponder what your answers for each question would be one by one.

What I want is not important, It's what you want that's important here.
You're reading this game review because you want to know if this game is something you will play or not.
And you want my opinion to help you figure an informed decision before you hit that install button.

OK, So instead of letting me ask these questions, YOU ask YOURSELF these questions.

I mean.. you have no reason to lie to yourself, right?
Hell even I admit, My Daddy was a raging alcoholic, and used to call me "Spyder" up until the day he died.

—Oh, wait, I already knew that.. And you didn't need to..
*crickets*
Umm.. Yeah.. So.. Where were we?

Right, Just Answer these damn questions already.
1. Do you Like guns?

2. Do you like First Person Shooter Games?

3. Have you ever been part of a team where teamwork is crucial to reaching your goal, yet, none of that ever occurs to you, and you just do what's best for you alone?

4. Do you like games made and published by valve?

*Aprox. 1 minute later*

Well?
What did you say to yourself?

C'mon open them eyes up already!
Huh? I couldn't hear you.
What about the Refrigerator?

Oh damn it!
Don't tell me you started drifting off thinking about food again, Didn't you Just eat dinner?

I don't know what's worse, your addiction to TikTok or your grotesque ability to wipe out the entire fridge In the middle of the night and somehow get away with blaming it on your sister all the while making her believe it too!

You know that girl got a body image issue now right?
Poor girl..
Can't tell herself between a candle & a forest fire..
Quit gaslighting her, She don't deserve them flames!
Just answer this one final question, If you said yes to even 3 out of questions I asked you earlier,
—HUH? You answered yes to All 5?

But I only asked you 4 questions!
I mean.. I guess I did technically ask you 5 if you count the qu-

Just delete that one damn game you keep downloaded that you haven't played in the since you got it and start the install process for this one already!

What do you mean "delete what game?"!
You know what one I'm talking about!


Uhh.. the one that you begged your Momma to buy so you could play with your friends because you found out they would occasionally play with that one person that caught your eye a few too many times then socially normal bout a year ago.

Yeah! the one you found out was already taken, that one.


Well..
Seeing as you haven't even bothered to touch that game and every time your friends get on and invite you to play, you always give them an excuse on why you can't, you might as well delete it and make room for Counter-Strike 2!

Because you're gonna love it!