Flesh Trombone 最近的评测

I want this to be good, it's not good.

I made a Khajit and he could punch stuff. I leveled up punching stuff, running places, and jumping to their maximum level but when I went to the arena I had trouble. I easily defeated my opponents by punching them until they could no longer stand up, then continuing to punch them as they lay bloody on the arena's dirt floor. I heard the crowd roaring as my fists crashed into the Grey Orc's skull; I felt their love wash over me like a crimson silk gown. Slowly, after the vampire scum gave out his last breath, I walked out of the arena. Not in triumph, not in victory, but in remorse. I had just punched my way through a dozen or more skulls, and for what? In my agony I gloomily set up at the The Bloated Float Inn, located in the Imperial City's Waterfront District. I woke up to the sounds of rustling, was confronted by a clearly beligerant bandit. The man had no idea I was the Arena Champion, he had not heard how I crushed the skulls of countless enemies with my punching, how I jumped clear over them with little effort, or even how I ran circles around the arena dodging every single attack thrown at me before pummeling my opponents into submission. The very idea of the man standing before me, a person unknowing of my athletic prowess, set me in to an uncontrollable rage. I don't recall what happened over then next ten minutes, but my memory picks back up again standing inside of the Inn owner's cabin covered head to toe in blood. I navigated back through the ship, which now more resembled a slaughter house, to try to find someone who could tell me what happened. Located in the messhall I found a naked shivering woman named Selene. I will never forget the look on her face when I approached her, a visage of fear so vivid the viewer can feel it.

It was then I realized what event must had befallen the denizens of The Bloated Float Inn. The ingorance of that would-be bandit set me into a blood fueled rage. I slaughtered every person aboard the ship for his sin, that is, every person save for this trembling woman. I decided then and there to never use my fists again, I set off from the boat, WHICH HADN'T LEFT THE HARBOR, to embark on a pilgrimage. One that would encapsulate all nine divine shrines and eventually lead an unwilling khajit boxer to defeat the ancient Aylied king Umaril using only Talk good skill, run fast skill, and jump high skill. After defeating such an awesome foe I came to the conclusion that one need not fight with his fists to attain his goals. Through the use of hecka convincing words, speedy feet, and super strong legs, anyone can stamp out evil without ever lifting a finger.

Oblivion taught me the greatest lesson of all, that fighting is evil.

It's like Minecraft and Terraria had a baby but Terraria was an absentee father so Starbound is nothing like that poop game and is more like Minecraft and Minecraft's next door neighbor The Elder Scrolls. There's capes and farming and birds and guns. This is the end all be all of video games. This is Indiana Jones sandbox game.