HAVE YOU SEEN THIS MAN?

Was last seen around early July, eating a cookie or mooning the LIRR or both.
He is also a polyglot and can speak a variety of languages, including English, Mandarin Chinese, Japanese, Spanish, Russian, German, and Hindi.

Famous Quotes:
• "Touch my butt"
• "Killing Floor is stupid because the floor has infinite health and poses no threat."
• "(While looking at spices) Ohh! Look at this! This says "Mexican!" Look! It's an entire Mexican in a bottle!"
• "I AM NOT A BUTT!"
• "You piece of ♥♥♥♥, eat my poo poo!!"
• "Touch my butt."
• "I can't do ♥♥♥♥ when I'm doing crap!"
• "If I had a million dollars, I would give you my butt!"
• "Would you do me the pleasure and honor of providing physical contact on my gluteus maximus?"
• "Don't buy LeapFrog, made by International Jew: Michael Milken!!"
• "If you think Eric is stupid, say 'Aye aye Captain!'"
• "Mmm mm! That's a good ass lemon!"
• "IF I RANDOM PHANTOM ASSASSIN AGAIN, I WILL ♥♥♥♥ MYSELF!!"
• "Watermelon and fried chicken. Grape soda and some grits in my mouth~!"
• "¡Yo tengo dos huevos grandes en mi boca todos los días!"
• "Touch my butt."
• "This candle smells like ♥♥♥♥, I'm gonna burn it!"


REWARD: Touching his butt.