Algebraic!

If you haven't noticed, there is another Adventure Time group that has twice as many people as we do. I'm not sure exactly how they got that many members so quickly or why they did it, but I few ideas: they could be terrorists and by joining the group you are secretly supporting terrorism, or they're Nazis, and they are going to use mind control on all their members to create a second second world war. Perhaps they are aliens using the group to destroy humanity or evil necromancer's who will somehow use the group to raise an undead army. Even though these ideas are not supported by any evidence and are probably just ridiculous lies, you should still tell them to as many people as possible as if they are true, because sometimes the most unlikely things are completely true and do not require any proof.


I've gone off track though. This announcement is to celebrate our new, unrelated project, "Invite as many friends as possible to the group and we'll give you nothing in exchange". Basically, you invite your friends to join the group, and besides the time you wasted inviting all those friends, nothing really happens and we don't give you anything. By now I'm sure you already have some questions, so we'll answer those below:

"What's in it for me?"- Rather than spend time and money and give you something of value, or just spend time and give you something worthless, we chose something in between: The satisfaction of knowing you've helped your group. It's not tangible, and when you're sitting on the side of the street later in life, homeless and dirty, it won't put food in your belly or a roof over your head. So what do you do with this satisfaction? You take it and never ever bother me about it again.

"Why do I want nothing?"- Helping us may not get you anything, but if you don't help us, you are supporting terrorism/antisemetism/aliens/necromancy! And everyone knows that terrorists/Nazis/aliens/necromancers are evil and only want to destroy humanity, take over the world, or do some other thing that I made up earlier but can't remember.

"How do I know you'll actually give me nothing?"- Many times these things are scams; you're promised nothing but the exact opposite happens and you get something. We will work hard to ensure that everyone is not rewarded in any way. Also if for some reason you do receive something, we not only promise to take back what you received, we'll take everything you own as well to make up for our mistake.

"When will I get nothing?"- Usually, you won't get anything in about a week. Sometimes it takes longer for you to get nothing, so just be patient. We can also give you the tracking number, so you can track the progress it doesn't make after we don't send it.

"Who can I contact for more information?"- Usually, you contact the admins for information about things happening within the group. However, under no circumstance should you bother me or any other admin about this at all because I don't want to listen to your stupid questions about things that I already addressed in the announcement. If it's a real question that I didn't already answer, flip a coin. If you get heads, the answer is yes, so don't bother me. If you get tails, flip it over so you get heads.

"Is this serious?"- Yes, I actually want people to go out and recruit more members. Yes, you will recieve nothing for your effort. Yes, I do not want to to contact me about it because it's really simple and if you have a question, just pretend it's one of the questions I already answered. I really want more members!


Also, if everyone gets at least one of there friends to join, I don't need to use clever wording in the description to make it sound like we are the most popular Adventure Time group, because it'll be true! It might even cause world peace or cure every disease know to man!* So go out there and recruit people!




*joining the group doesn't cause world peace or cure anything