i dont even get a option for the tow

Do you use Lesh's towing mod?

yes and i use the fir jets. as a temp fix i just made it so that people can pick the jets up with ace interaction

Did you copy the optional pbo for the Firewill Jets from @lesh_tow\optional to @lesh_tow\addons ?

as a bypass, you could get into zeus and temporarily attach the airvic to the tow tractor via an attachTo command either script line or with the zeus addon ares mod/ achilles mod)

but look at author's hint. i did that and towing works as a charm.

i also tested advanced towing from steam here: http://psteamcommunity.yuanyoumao.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=639837898 . But thats a lil' wonky :)