A lot of these can be disabled in the settings. Here's how to disable most of what you mentioned:

Firstly, most of these settings can be changed by pressing "Setup Game" > "TF's Zombie Option Pro".

Gambler - "Mod Games" > "Disable Gambler".

Bank - "System" > "Game Options" > "Disable Weapon Locker & Bank".

Giving Weapons To Friends - "System" > "Game Options" > "Disable Weapon Trade".

Keep Perks When Down - "Gameplay" > "Perk Options" > "Disable Timed-based Perk Loss".

Purifier Drop: "Gameplay" > "Powerup Options" > "Disable Purifier".

XP on Screen - I'm assuming you mean Score Events? If so then go "System" > "Game Options" > "Disable Score Events".

As for shooting whilst reviving and buying perks for friends, those don't seem like they can be disabled as of now. Or at least, I couldn't find a setting for it.

Anyways, hope this helps. :)