So you bought the game, im sorry to hear that. But now your thinking, "with all this 'quality game' i bought, how will i be able to beat it? Well instead of just leaving it to die in your steam library like so many have already planned to do, you can follow these simple steps and beat this ... "game".

Step 1. Load up the game and click new game. Simply wait for the intro to end and start walking around till you find people to talk to, or to click your water gun at.

Step 2. You'll be able to tell when the intro is done, as you stop walking like a snail and will run at the speed of sonic into your house just to be met by Putin.

Step 3. Once you've met Putin, simply go back to the main menu.

Step 4. Click select level

Step 5. Click on the last level to load it up

Step 6. Your done, the credits will roll so now you can quit the game and say you've beaten it.

Well nothing for now, since all the other promised features arn't in the game yet, theres nothing to do but let it rot in your steam library. You could go and ask the forums for help on parts of the game, but I wouldn't, seeing as how you'll just be banned for trolling if you do that.
You could always just wait for the promised features to arive, but lets be honest, if the games ♥♥♥♥, whos to say the other features are going to be any better?