Sid Meier's Civilization V

Sid Meier's Civilization V

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How To Regain Your Life After Getting Hooked on Civilization V
由 WINTERS 制作
You want to finally quit playing this Game ?
Stop Playing the Game.
JUST STOP!
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I Don't Have a Civ 5 Problem...... I Can Quit Anytime I Want
Sure you can ....


Civilization V Isn’t That Addictive
(You’re Fine, Totally Fine)
You’re not addicted to Civilization V. Don’t be ridiculous. You’re just… strategically committed. It’s not like you’ve been awake since 2 a.m. trying to outmaneuver Gandhi again. You just value efficiency — and maybe world domination — in moderation.

People exaggerate. They say “Civ V consumes your life.” Please. You can quit anytime. You just need to finish researching Plastics. And maybe build the Eiffel Tower. And maybe—okay, after this era ends. Then you’ll take a break. Probably.

This isn’t addiction — it’s education. You’ve learned real history here. You now know that Napoleon is insufferable, Gandhi has anger issues, and the Aztecs really overcommit to early-game aggression. That’s culture.
Your empire just discovered refrigeration, and honestly, that’s a big deal.

And sure, you sometimes whisper “just one more turn” as if it’s a harmless phrase — not the battle cry of every sleep-deprived ruler since 2010. But that’s fine. Everyone has hobbies. Some people knit. Some people run marathons. You casually bend human history to your will in hexagonal time units.

So don’t let anyone call it addiction. You’re not hooked. You’re simply… dedicated to progress.
You’re an emperor of your own empire. A curator of destiny. A responsible adult who occasionally forgets what daylight feels like because your city-state allies needed one more trade route.
You’re fine.

Totally fine.

Right after this next turn......
How To Quit Civilization V
How to Quit Civilization 5

A 12-Step (Per Turn) Guide to Reclaiming Your Life

Step 1: Admit You Have a Problem
You whisper, “Just one more turn,” at 3:47 a.m.
Your food is cold, your empire is on fire, and Gandhi has nukes again.
Congratulations — you’re in the right place.


Step 2: Say Your Goodbyes
Uninstall? Too harsh.
Just… look at your empire one last time. Zoom in on your glorious capital.
Now whisper:“You were a fine civilization, but I must return to my real one.”
Then alt+F4 before you change your mind.


Step 3: Hide the Evidence
Rename your Civ V folder something terrifying like
TAX_DOCUMENTS_2016_DO_NOT_OPEN.
Your brain will stay away instinctively.
(It’s science.)


Step 4: Replace the Rush
Your dopamine receptors now expect the thrill of founding a city every 12 seconds.
To compensate, try:
  • Doing laundry while pretending each sock is a new settlement.
  • Competing with neighbors for “territory” at the grocery store.
  • Saying “We love the king day!” every time you get paid.

Step 5: Block Gandhi
If you ever feel tempted, remember Gandhi’s smiling face as he calmly launched nukes on your peaceful cultural utopia.
Print that image.
Stick it on your wall.
Label it: “The Face of Relapse.”


Step 6: Tell Your Friends (If You Still Have Any)
Explain that you’ve been in a “turn-based relationship” and it’s over now.
They may not understand.
That’s okay — they’ve been waiting for you since 2014.


Step 7: Transfer Skills to Real Life
You’ve mastered diplomacy, resource management, and city planning.
Use those skills!
  • Negotiate peace with your landlord.
  • Settle a new colony in the living room (a.k.a. cleaning).
  • Build a wonder: a decent sleep schedule.

Step 8: Handle Cravings
When you hear that little “next turn” chime in your head:
Take a deep breath.
Drink water.


Step 9: Beware Civilization VI
It looks innocent.
It’s not.
That’s just Civ V in a new hat.
Stay vigilant.


Step 10: Fill the Void
Without Civ, you’ll suddenly have free time.
You’ll feel confused. Vulnerable.
Try something new:
  • Reading a book.
  • Learning a language.
  • Actually taking over the world, but legally.
Step 11: Forgive Yourself
You will relapse.
You’ll reinstall.
You’ll play until 4 a.m. on a weekday.
That’s okay. Every civilization falls eventually. What matters is rebuilding — ideally not in the same save file.


Step 12: Celebrate
You’ve done it. You quit (for now).
Light a candle. Play peaceful music.
Then open Steam
… just to update it… not to play… right?

right?
Final Turn
A Message to the Uninitiated
Listen, new player. Before you install Civilization V, before you whisper “just to try it out,” before you tell yourself it’s only a strategy game — stop. Turn back. This isn’t a game. This is a black hole in the shape of a turn by turn strategy game.

You think you’ll play a quick match before dinner. Cute. Next thing you know, it’s 4 a.m., you’ve become the Supreme Leader of a country named “FartLand,” and you’re arguing with yourself about whether to adopt Rationalism or Freedom like it’s a real political crisis.

You’ll tell yourself you’re learning history. You’ll tell your friends it’s “basically educational.” Lies. You’re not learning history — you’re rewriting it, badly. By turn 250, you’ll have Napoleon founding Buddhism in Rio de Janeiro while Gandhi stockpiles uranium.

You’ll laugh at how slow it starts. “Oh, this isn’t so bad,” you’ll say — right before the Next Turn button becomes your entire personality. That’s how it begins. Civilization doesn’t take your soul all at once; it taxes it per turn.

You’ll stop checking the clock. You’ll stop checking your texts. You’ll look up once in the real world — your beard has grown, your food’s fossilized, and your empire still hasn’t finished the Great Library.

So, to all potential players out there: don’t do it.
Don’t start that “one casual round.”
Don’t fall for the map’s gentle music, the promise of diplomacy, or the seductive whisper of “just one more turn.”
  • You see the game and you think Its a good Idea to give it a try. Please don't!
  • You buy the game. You think people are exaggerating. Of course they are..right? Wrong!
  • You download the game and wait anxiously to install it on your PC. You still have time ..
  • You see the coolest intro in your entire life... You feel ready to take on the world.... Get ready to loose your social life

Because by the time you realize it’s not a game…
it’s already the Industrial Era, and you’re too far gone.
9 条留言
cazmania 7 小时以前 
I don't have time to write stuff here! Don't you know what's happening? Everyone has nukes but me and I'm trying fend off a swarm of Khan's tanks and artillery with a bunch of half dead cavalry and a biplane! But, I'm ok, I'll do it, I maybe behind the technological curve but I've got a lot of cities and I'm smarter than these guys... I just need another few turns to hold them off and get artillery researched and built, then I'll sleep, probably.
Darth Helmet 11 月 29 日 上午 8:05 
so true
afsasfafasfsafa 11 月 26 日 下午 1:45 
(real)
Mike Hunt 11 月 24 日 下午 11:49 
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Locer Gamal 11 月 23 日 上午 1:26 
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afn 11 月 22 日 下午 5:07 
nice1
ХАРЬКАНАЛЬ 11 月 19 日 上午 3:15 
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Frozenthought 11 月 10 日 下午 1:31 
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WINTERS  [作者] 11 月 4 日 下午 10:04 
此留言正在等待我们的自动内容检查系统分析。在我们证实其内容无害之前(例如试图窃取信息的钓鱼站点链接),留言将暂时隐藏。