1. You must have never purchased a video game in your life. Not on Steam, not on Epic, not on Origin, not at your local Gamestop, not even a Farmville microtransaction. Gabe Newell will know.
   
2. Your profile must be private. Nobody can know who you are. You're too important to give your information out to anybody.
   
3. The Steam community can't just be something you ignore. You must go further than shun it, too. You must actively spurn all attempts at socializing with others and establish yourself as the resident hermit of Steam.
   
4. Start a votekick at every opportunity. If there's not currently a vote up, that means a vote can be put up, and you should be the one to jump at such a chance. After all, if you don't, maybe your teammates will try to votekick you, and you can't be having that.
   
5. Bother everybody. Be toxic. Sigma male grindsets leave no room for fraternal association with your peers; that's beta male activity, and everybody knows that alpha-beta-omega social dynamics are evidence-based and not a sham for views and clicks.
   
6. What's Overwatch? Let's be honest, who even cares?
   
7. Receive only scorn from your allies. Nobody can approve of you except you. If other people approve of what you're doing, it's not individualistic enough, and you wouldn't want to be seen as part of the crowd, would you?
   
8. Report everybody. Everyone's done something wrong, they just haven't told you yet. Sometimes people will share their darkest secrets with others, but this generally requires building rapport, and building rapport is a beta male activity. Thin the herd of these profligates and let the Lord above (Gabe Newell) sort them out.
   
9. After reporting and votekicking your teammates, remember to mute and block them so you don't have to hear them complain. It's not your problem.
   
10. Never view a demo. You don't need to record or review your feats, you can just do them again. Other people's feats are irrelevant.
    
11. Crank your mouse sensitivity and drink the strongest coffee you can brew so it looks like you're cheating. Remember to shoot through thin doors and walls to try and wallbang as well. You're not actually cheating, you're just making your teammates trust you more because it looks like you know what you're doing.
    
12. Remove all your friends. Listen to loner music like The Conet Project, Filosofem, Nebraska, and the like to solidify your separation from humanity. Listening to anything less than an album is not loner enough. Remember, friendship is not the purview of a sigma male, and hermitage is a goal.
    
13. Never comment on Steam. We've already established socializing is in poor taste, so why would you even consider doing this?
    
14. Never give Steam awards. Think of all the things you could do with those Steam points. You could purchase another emoji, another sticker, another background. You know what that other person is going to do with those Steam points? The exact same thing, except with your Steam points. Couldn't be me.
    
15. Now that you've already votekicked, muted, and blocked your teammates, you may as well shoot them too.
    
16. If you're going to give a guide a rating, downrate it.
    
17. If you're going to write a guide, don't. Guides help people (assuming there is written, helpful material and not just an animated gif of a scantily-clad anime celebrity woman in front of a motor vehicle), and helping people - you guessed it - is a beta male activity.
    
18. Do not play any video game. We already established you cannot purchase a video game, but free-to-play ones are also off-limits. Why? Not because it's a beta male activity or because they usually involve socializing, but because you could be touching grass with that time.
    
19. Never set up your Steam profile. When people see the white question mark on the grey background, click on your profile, and see Steam's stock message telling them you haven't even opened your own profile once, that asserts dominance.

Copy and paste these fun messages to your friends' profiles to let them know you're thinking of them.

-rep smol pp
-rep stole my awp
-rep voted for the wrong surf map
-rep can't hit the bhop on dust2 just right
-rep did not in fact hit that yoinky sploinky
-rep was down to last 2 prisoners in jailbreak, had a freestyle competition, and his flow was wack (you may substitute "his" for the reader's preferred gender)
-rep bad taste (I Will Not Elaborate)
-rep -rep
-rep -rep -rep
-rep nep
-rep does not rep the set
-rep a goofy, fun-loving fella