pullup and knock 3.5 times. run to mail box, hit the shimmy, then SPRINT inside. it'll be waiting for you behind the VCR player. dont tell anyone

Stop the hate. I goon with the boys for reasons you wouldn't understand. For years I was alone dry rubbing into old tshirts and ashamed of myself. It was self destructive and a dead end. Then I discovered the boys and the goon cave. We all pool our money to get top notch lube, soft shammies, and premium subscription services. I have more time edging, a wider selection of adult content, and my knob has never looked better. Fully hydrated. We even hit up camgirls on Saturday nights for a live experience. I could have never done this without the boys. What we have is magical, and it's healthier and safer than anything my ex girlfriend would have me do. So, next time you walk by and the door's shut, knock first. We in here gooning and if it offends you don't come knockin.

Hi, I am an albanian virus but because of poor technology in my country unfortunately I am not able to harm your computer. Please be so kind to delete one of your important files yourself and then forward me other users. Many thanks for your cooperation! Best regards,Albanian virus

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Jaw drops to table with tongue rolling out like a carpet, gasping dramatically
VA-VA-VA-VOOM!
Jumps into the air horizontally, straight as a rod, hovering while wolf-whistling obnoxiously loud
WHEE-WHEEOO!
Starts flying through the air like an aeroplane making pretend machinegun noises before crashing down into the seat
NYYYEEEARRRRR, BOOSH!
Frantically taps foot against the floor while slamming fists repeatedly on the table, rattling any plates, bowls, or silverware
HELLO, NURSE!
Heart starts beating so hard it visibly thumps an entire 3 feet out of chest through the shirt in the stereotypical shape of the playing cards suit
BA-BUM, BA-BUM!