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报告翻译问题

+rep is such a noob, it makes me look better in comparison
#gay
"Darling, I missed you so much. I'm so glad I brought the station you lived in, prompting you and your friends to move to New York. I have never felt such love for another part-machine before. Oh, touch me there Tommy-boy."
Suddenly, Cory from the marginally less successful spinoff show of That's So Raven, Cory in the House, walked in.
"I'm sorry- TONY! HOW COULD YOU?" He screamed. His husband of three years had been betraying him? Cory waddled forward and slapped the train in its face, crying.
"Iron Man, my love, your husband has caught us in the middle of our sexy time! Whatever shall we do?" Tony grinned. "He can join in, of course!"
"Not without me!" The group looked up to see Spiderman (from the Amazing Spiderman because Peter was far more bootylicious when played by Andrew Garfield) hanging from the ceiling.