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报告翻译问题

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You've been visited by the fedora of mystery! Tip yours to a friend or you'll be haunted by the spirit of fashionable wear.
*brofist*
*brofist*
Give this to the prettiest girl you know...
If you get it back you're beautiful. ..
❤¸.•*""*•. ¸❤ ❤¸.•*""*•. ¸❤ ❤¸.•*""*•. ¸❤
your page has been invaded by the deadly memebola!
(✖╭╮✖)
(Don't let this be u!!!)
Spread the disease onto 7 other victims for a voodoo ritual cleansing!
<{[WARNING]}>
2004 B.C - 2019 A.D
@@@@8^{
god bless america
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xXxGURLPOWERxXx
in 2003 new meme was discorverd in the amazon forest. scientists and paleantoligist quickly realise the power of this new mem and quickly sned it of to top secret MLG HQ, in a chamber filled with subzero liquid-mntn dew. unfortunate a snich from 4chuan found the meme and report to illuninati. the mem e was taken to the pentagon and now society is in danger, I WARN YOUY, FELLOW BROYNY. PREPARE FRO WAR. TE 9GAG ARMY MUST B READY.
stock up on as mny doritos and mountan dews as possible and army yourself with your classiest feodra, your most enigmatic trenchcoa, and your best shorts. the world is in grim times, and to you i tip my feodrs in good lucks. practise your quicjscopeing and meditteate to lincone park.
c u in the future *tips fedora intom moonlight*
and good luck, stay euphorifx
manig
- xX::d4rkw0lft33n06::Xx
mangleds curse
safety alert from the al qaeda and the Canadian govt
this seller will try to give you the best deal for your orbiting tc flames for an offline handjob
THIS IS REAL
nobody knows that you can have orbiting tc flames
this has been a warning from : USSR
warning from the pentagon and the US govt
this trader will try to scam your orbiting tc flames for an online blowjob
THIS IS FAKE
everyone knows that you cant have orbiting tc flames
this has been a safety briefing from: NASA
in the back of a pick-up truck
with hockey pucks and skateboards
on their way to Woodstock
Leave home the glock
I have a gun the size of a blackhole
Shoot planets
Don't get credit
Throw your hands up in the air
Don't panic
Supreme arm leg leg arm head
Wu-Tang-Clan playin' the tightest long dreads."