Yeow <3

After a long hard day of work, I like to relax in my masturbation station. Sometimes, after a particularly rigorous endeavor, my dong reeks to high hell of a vile, insoluble concoction of sweat, coom, lube and pizza grease only a man of your stature could comprehend. Sorcerers across numerous ancient and fallen empires alike have scoured elder wisdom in order to find the most purest of elixirs to cure the curse of mortality. I'm proud to announce that this unholy substance which would liberate man from his rusted, rapidly oxidizing shackles is here. Beneath my wrinkled, phimosic epidermis helmet lies the cure to your mortality. I humbly invite you to clean the c0ck rot from my shaft for the chance at unending days and well rested nights. Just pm me the last 4 digits of your drivers licence, mother's maiden name and 28 oz of salvia divinorum