The lights are off, and I slowly sit down in my chair. I close my eyes and open my wallet. I meditate to the thought of Gaben. I let him consume me. Every inch of my body, covered in His holiness. I'm hard. I open my eyes, and boot up Counter-Strike: Global Offensive. Feeling Gaben's love, I quickly select find a game and begin queuing Cobblestone, and only Cobblestone. It is the map of the grail of Gaben... the Dragon Lore. The green button suddenly appears in my face, I click accept, and the match begins. I have no fear for I know that Gaben is with me. I join CT side and my team is filled with Global Elite smurfs. I'm still hard. Pistol round begins, and we decimate our opponents. Every round after, we win without losing a man, or even an hp, or even kevlar. We win the game 16-0, and the drops begin. A dragon lore drops for everybody on my team, and everyone on the other team gets a vanguard case, which they are obliged to open. The ranks appear, and I was placed in a game against 5 globals while everyone on my team was silver. My computer explodes as I rank up twelve times, to the never before seen rank of Son of Newell. Gaben flies out of the front of my burning monitor, and gives a re-loadable steam card already filled with one million dollars. I cum. Then I queue Dust II and lose to a bunch of hackers.