Hey, it's me, Queen Elizabeth. Charles sent me to a deserted island so he could be King. I don't have access to my royal money so please cashapp me $300 so I can get back to the UK.

~Tea and biscuits! 👋

*jaw drops to floor, eyes pop out of sockets accompanied by trumpets, heart beats out of chest, awooga awooga sound effect, pulls chain on train whistle that has appeared next to head as steam blows out, slams fists on table, rattling any plates, bowls or silverware, whistles loudly, fireworks shoot from top of head, pants loudly as tongue hangs out of mouth, wipes comically large bead of sweat from forehead, clears throat, straightens tie, combs hair* Ahem, you look very lovely.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ my ♥♥♥♥ is going to fall out of its foreskin if I have to hear, “hehe it’s morbin time” ONE MORE TIME. Not only is it NOT funny, IT DOESNT EVEN MAKE SENSE. THE POWER RANGERS HAVENT BEEN RELEVANT IN DECADES. MORBIUS SUCKS THE MOVIE IS COMPLETE TRASH AND IM ASHAMED TO HAVE SPENT MONEY ON IT. You know…. I never would have seen the movie without all of these “memes”(unfunny ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥). I would have been a MUCH HAPPIER PERSON. So ♥♥♥♥ your “MORBIUS” your “mighty morbin more morbs morbidly MORBIUS ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥” NO ONE CARES, YOU ARENT FUNNY. Does not a singular human being have any independent thought anymore???? “Morb morb morb morb” you’re like a BUNCH OF SEAGULLS. SEA GULLS.

ㅤ ∧＿∧
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ε (_)へ⌒ヽﾌ
(　　(　•̀o•)
◎―◎ ⊃ ⊃ NYYOOOOOOOOMMMMM BEEP BEEP꙳⸌☆⸍꙳ ur so cute okay bye ꙳⸌☆⸍꙳ SPEEDS AWAY NYOOOMMM

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⌒ヽ(“､)chu i c-can be anywhere uguu.., anytime (⁄ ⁄>⁄ ▽ ⁄<⁄ ⁄).. and i c-can k-kill y-you in over seven hundwed ways, and that’s j-just with my bare hands. not onwy am i extensivewy twained i-in u-unawmed c-combat, but i have access to t-the entire awsenaw of the united states mawine cowps and i w-will use it to its full extent to wipe y-youw misewable boi ♥♥♥♥♥ off the face of the c-continent, you wittle p-poopoo. if onwy y-you couwd have k-known what unhowy wetwibution youw wittle “cwevew” c-comment w-was about to bwing d-down upon you, maybe you w-wouwd have hewd youw fwickking tongue. but you couwdn’t, you didn’tO.o and now ur p-paying the pwice, you ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ idiot. i will poopoo fuwy all over y-you and you will dwown in it (≧◡≦) ur fwickking dead, k-kiddo.

w-what the fwickk did you just fwickking say about me,,, y-you wittle m-meanie? i-i’ll have you know i gwaduated t-top of my cwass in the navy seaws, and i’ve been invowved in numewous s-secwet w-waids on aw-quaeda, and i have o-over 300 confiwmed kills ☆⌒ヽ(“､)chu i am twained in g-gowiwwa w-wawfare and i’m the top sniper in the e-entire us a-awmed fowces〜☆ you are nothing t-to me b-but just a-another tawget ☆:・ﾟ i will wipe you the fwickk out with pwecision the wikes of which has never been seen before on this eawth, mawk my fwickking wowds-.- you think you can get away with saying that p-poopoo to me over the intewnet〜☆ t-think again (.).., f-fwickker ☆:・ﾟ a-as we speak i am contacting my secwet netwowk of spies acwoss the u-usa and youw i-ip is b-being twaced wight now so y-you better pwepare f-fow the s-stowm, maggot.

I am not even calling it e dating anymore because I know we will meet soon enough heart OK I ADMIT IT I LOVE YOU OK i hecking love you and it breaks my heart when i see you play with someone else or anyone commenting in your profile i just want to be your girlfriend and put a heart in my profile linking to your profile and have a walltext of you commenting cute things i want to play video games talk in discord all night and watch a movie together but you just seem so uninsterested in me it hecking kills me and i cant take it anymore i want to remove you but i care too much about you so please i’m begging you to eaither love me back or remove me and never contact me again it hurts so much to say this because i need you by my side but if you dont love me then i want you to leave because seeing your icon in my friendlist would kill me everyday of my pathetic life.

can we honestly e date? you’re so beautiful. You always make me laugh, you always make me smile. You literally make me want to become a better person... I really enjoy every moment we spend together. My time has no value unless its spent with you. I tell everyone of my irls how awesome you are. Thank you for being you. Whenever you need someone to be there for you, know that i’ll always be right there by your side. I love you so much. I don’t think you ever realize how amazing you are sometimes. Life isn’t as fun when you’re not around. You are truly stunning. I want you to be my soulmate. I love the way you smile, your eyes are absolutely gorgeous. If I had a star for everytime you crossed my mind i could make the entire galaxy. Your personality is as pretty as you are and thats saying something. I love you, please date me.

We all love ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥! Unfortunately, even the best ♥♥♥ rarely result in a global surge of biodiversity comparable to that of the Cambrian Explosion, a diversification of modern life that occurred approximately 540 million years ago and created nearly all species that are alive today. If you feel like there’s simply no way you can ♥♥♥ hard enough to change the course of geologic history, don’t worry. Here is a tip for bringing your ♥♥♥ to the next level by triggering a major evolutionary event:

♥♥♥ in a highly oxygenated environment.

Scientists have hypothesized that an increase in atmospheric oxygen prior to the Cambrian Explosion may have facilitated the ability of different species to grow and develop. If your ♥♥♥ isn’t resulting in the desired surge of flora and fauna, check to make sure you’re not ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ in an oxygen-starved environment.

Hmmmm. WoW.

i had to drop u cause u r inactive, give me a shout on youtube.com/DillontheLion

hah!!

hehe