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报告翻译问题

I invited him to my house for a csgo lan party. He said he was coming so i was looking forward to meeting him in real life.
When he arrived at my house, he pushed me against the wall and started nibbling my ear, i felt his hard ♥♥♥♥ push against my leg. I punched him and then 1 tapped him. Turns out he was gay. Don't trust this guy.
you're sharing👍🍖 protein🍗
you're 😏👌admiring masculine💪 🍆👀physique😩😩
being in the vacinity of other ⬆️high ⬆️testosterone males 👬👬👅⤴️increases ⤴️your own testosterone👌👍👅
eating ♥♥♥♥♥ 😿🙅♂️is gay 👨❤️👨because you're litterally slurp😏ing down ⤵️estrogen⤵️and long term relationships have been proven to ⬇️lower ⬇️testosterone.
spartans 🏋️♀️💪had gay 👨❤️👨👨❤️💋👨orgies👅💦 all the 🕡🕜time 🕐🕟and they were the 📈⬆️height of 👍👨❤️👨masculinity. 💪😩you bet they were at ❗️least ❗️fondling eachothers test producers.
all these ☀️summer ☀️DYEL's piss 😑me off😡😡their 😍twink😜bodies don't ❌understand, but in 🕐time i'm sure they'll get it.
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▄░▐░░░▄▄░█░▀▀ U HAVE BEEN SPOOKED BY THE
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░░░░░░▐▌▀▄▀▄▀▐▄SPOOKY SKELENTON
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PS SEND DIS TO 9 PEPOL OR ULL GET KILLDED
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░░░▀▀░▄Smoo▄░░░▐▄▄▄▀░░░
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..._.....____________________, ,
....../ `---___________----_____] = = = = = D
...../_==o;;;;;;;;_______.:/
.....), ---.(_(__) /
....// (..) ), ----"
...//___//
..//___//
.//___//
WE TRUE HOMIES
WE RIDE TOGETHER
WE DIE TOGETHER
send this GUN to everyone you care about including me if you care. C how many times you get this, if you get a 13 your A TRUE HOMIE