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报告翻译问题

Midget: You'd be surprised how many woman find my size
intriguingly alluring.
Mulder: You'd be surprised how many men do as well.
"The X-Files: Humbug"
Mulder: Hey Scully, can you spare a prophylactic?
"The X-Files: Soft Light"
🏓 ✶ 🐟 ✶ 🎍 ✶ 🎁 ✶ 📕 ✶ 🕺 ✶ 💎 ✶ 🐠 ✶ 🥞 ✶ 📗 ✶ 🚙 ✶ 🚕 ✶ 🎽 ✶ 🚗
██]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 10% complete.....
████]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 35% complete....
███████]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 60% complete....
███████████] 99% complete.....
🚫ERROR!🚫 💯True💯 Daddies are irreplaceable 💖I could never delete you Daddy!💖 Send this to ten other 👪Daddies👪 who give you 💦cummies💦 Or never get called ☁️squishy☁️ again❌❌❌❌ If you get 0 Back: no cummies for you 🚫🚫👿 3 back: you're squishy☁️💦 5 back: you're daddy's kitten👼💦 10+ back: Daddy💕💕💦👅👅
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It's COOL to be gay!
Post this on the wall of a homosexual friend and tell them how COOL they are :)
....(░(¯ `·.(█).·´¯)░░(¯`:´¯)░)
......(░(_.·´/|\`·._)(¯ `·.\|/.·´¯)░)
.........(░(_.:._).░(¯ `·.(█).·´¯)░)
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¸ . ° ¸. * ● ¸ . ...somewhere ° ☾ ° ¸. ● ¸ . ★ ° :.
. • ° . * :. . ¸ . ● ¸ ★ ★☾ °★ .
. °☆ . ● ¸ . ★ ° . • ○ ° ★ .
* . ☾ ° ¸. ...Way up high* ● ¸ ° ☾ °☆ . * ¸. ★ ★ ° . .
¸ . ° ¸. * ● ¸ . ... in the Universe... ° ☾ ★ ° .
. • ° . * :. . ¸ . ● ¸ ★ ★☾ °★ . ★ ° . . . ☾ °☆ . * ● ¸ . ★ ° :. . • ○ You're a ♥♥♥♥♥♥: . ° . ● . ° ☾ °☆ ¸.
● . ★ ★ ° ☾ ☆ ¸. ¸ ★ :. . • ○ ° ★ . * . .
¸ . ° ¸. * ● ¸ . ° ☾ ° ¸. ● ¸ . ★
┻━┻ ︵ ヽ(°□°ヽ) FLIP THIS TABLE.
┻━┻ ︵ \\('0')// ︵ ┻━┻ FLIP ALL THE TABLES
ಠ_ಠ Son...
ಠ_ಠ Put.
ಠ__ಠ The tables.
ಠ___ಠ Back.
(╮°-°)╮┳━┳
(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻ NEVER
ಠ_ಠ Son...
(╮°-°)╮┳━┳ WHAT
ಠ_ಠ You'll Be Punished....
(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻ FLIP THAT TABLE.
┻━┻ ︵ ヽ(°□°ヽ) FLIP THIS TABLE.
┻━┻ ︵ \\('0')// ︵ ┻━┻ FLIP ALL THE TABLES CUZ I DON'T CARE
ಠ__ಠ Put The Tables.....BACK
(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻ FLIP THAT TABLE.
┻━┻ ︵ ヽ(°□°ヽ) FLIP THIS TABLE.
┻━┻ ︵ \\('0')// ︵ ┻━┻ FLIP ALL THE TABLES4EVER CUZ NO!
ಠ___ಠ Whatever....