Little story of this guy. Hadn't heard from him in a long time, decided to hit him up to play some games. Started playing with him like I used to for a couple months when he asked me to give him some money cause times were tough. Known him for 5+ years so didnt think anything of it. Sent him around $500 that he said he needed to use for rent or he would get evicted. He then took my money and put it all on black at the casino. He ended up losing it all and had the nerve to ask me for more cause he truly did need to pay rent. Gave him some more and then he blew it all on cigarettes. Turns out he lives with his parents still and never needed to pay rent.
-Rep

raging racist from Canada who is a pervert +rep

↖🐯

-rep was friends with this guy for years and played with him all the time. never knew what he looked like that whole time and he sounded like he was a white guy. finally got a picture of this dude and turns out... HES INDIAN??????? LIKE A TRUE DOT HEAD MF.
idk about you but i dont want those poop slingers near me. i'd steer clear of Goaty, turns out his uncle married a 14 year old too. sucks to lose a good friend but i just can't stand stinky, putrid, nasty indians.

gg

2025!

I just wanna let everyone know i taught this guy how to play rust now look how many hours he has :)

-rep was friends with this guy for years and played with him all the time. never knew what he looked like that whole time and he sounded like he was a white guy. finally got a picture of this dude and turns out... HES INDIAN??????? LIKE A TRUE DOT HEAD MF.
idk about you but i dont want those poop slingers near me. i'd steer clear of Goaty, turns out his uncle married a 14 year old too. sucks to lose a good friend but i just can't stand stinky, putrid, nasty indians.

I'M DELETING YOU, BROTHER!

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🚫ERROR!🚫 💯True💯 Brothers of Islam are irreplaceable ☪I could never delete you Brother!💖 Send this to ten other 👪Mujahideen👪 who would give their lives for ﷲAllahﷲ Or never get called ☁️Brother☁️ again If you get

0 Back: Juhanam for you 🚫†✡🚫

3 back: you're off the martyr list☁️💦

5 back: you have pleased Allah greatly☪💦

10+ back: JANAHﷲ!ﷲ!💕💕☪👅👅

this guy seems mentally retarded

═══════════ 🔱🔱🔱🔱🔱🔱🔱═════════════
🧡 Cool Guy 🧡
⚡⚡ Let’s be friends for future games ⚡⚡

🌟🌟 Have a wonderful year🌟🌟
💫💫 Stay safe & take care💫💫

🔥🔥🔥+REP The profile is fire 🔥🔥🔥


════════════🔱🔱🔱🔱🔱🔱═════════════

═══════════ 🔱🔱🔱🔱🔱🔱🔱═════════════
🧡 Cool Guy 🧡
⚡⚡ Let’s be friends for future games ⚡⚡

🌟🌟 Have a wonderful year🌟🌟
💫💫 Stay safe & take care💫💫

🔥🔥🔥+REP The profile is fire 🔥🔥🔥


════════════🔱🔱🔱🔱🔱🔱═════════════

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2024!

-rep trash ass cheater on alts, then logs on his main to comment on profiles. Literally just trash and cheating.

-rep (keep reading)... I met Goaty in winter of 2007 and we instantly became good friends. As our friendship developed we became more then just online friends. i got a ticket to Canada and we decided to hangout in person for the first time. Little did I know Goaty had been deceiving me. I stepped outside of the airport and I see some insanely HOT chick holding a sign that read "Kinto". I was super happy because I thought WOW Goaty is actually this super hot babe. Turns out... this was his caretaker. I walked over to the van and from 5 feet away this PUTRID smell hit me. She opened the door and there he was. Goaty. A little background knowledge, he would tell me he was a fitness guru and a ladies man. It turns out Goaty is MORBIDLY obese and a native american, not a white man like he said. But he has been my friend for 12 years by now (took place in 2019) so I couldn't just leave. Goaty started to crack jokes and say whats up when I got into the car. (Continued)

I was instantly lightheaded from the smell. We finally made it back to Goaty's apartment and he is DEF NOT a ladies man after what I saw. I saw multiple d*ldos covered in ♥♥♥♥. Actual SH*T! I went to go leave but goaty locked the door. He pushed me to the ground and slowly got out of his chair. He sat on my face. I am in the ER as I type this because I was suffocating. I lost a lot of brain functionality from not being able to breathe. DONT add this guy.

+rep

+rep Once upon a time, there was a man named Goaty Ramsbottom. He was widely regarded as a truly horrible guy, leaving a trail of misery and chaos wherever he went. Goaty possessed a malevolent spirit that seemed to thrive on causing pain and suffering to those unfortunate enough to cross his path.Goaty had a repulsive appearance that mirrored his dark personality. His unkempt hair was greasy and matted, and his eyes were cold and lifeless, devoid of any empathy or compassion. His perpetual scowl etched deep lines on his face, reflecting the contempt he held for the world around him.

-rep, used to be tight with him a few years ago and he always was a chill and NORMAL person. Recently got back into playing with him and he got really drunk and starting to open up, he revealed that he has been fantasizing apes. That's right, he told me the last 8-9 months he has been enjoying the sexual presence and tension between apes, monkeys, chimps, and etc. I am so disgusted with this and I just had to get it off my mind, be careful who you meet on the internet. :/

Hey bro! Add me pls

too many hours in rust

raging racist from canada who sa'd my down syndrome sister, +rep

2023

what year is this.... im lost

+rep nice person 😉

hey, sorry but i saw your profile and i just thought that you seemed really nice and looked and sounded kinda cute hehe. i just really wanted to tell you that. its really rare to see girls playing games hehe. i dont know why its a guy thing tbh like im really against misogyny and like ill be the one in the kitchen making sandwiches. We should really play L4D2 sometime. its a really cool zombie game with a lot of scary moments, but dont worry ill protect you ;) sorry that wasnt flirting i swear im just trying to be friendly i really like your profile picture sorry was that too far? really sorry im really shy i dont go out much haha add me on skype we should talk you look really nice and fun xxx

hello... i am trapped in a very deep, dark vortex and I need your help soldier. You have to save me, YOU are the only one Goaty. I have some news for you. I am LukasAnthoneyBartholamuleJamesTheThirdJunior and I am your great grandfather. I have came back from an infinte time gap and i need help. please johnson. please

Saw your post on DreamTeam looking for a solid 5th. I'm from Russia, so North East US. Rank in MM was Silver 2 but I don't play MM anymore. I play ESEA now. Rank S. Hope I can be considered. I applied to the DreamTeam post and sent a friend request.

IM DELETING YOU, BROTHER!

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ERROR! Brothers of Islam are irreplaceable I could never delete you Brother!

Send this to ten other Mujahideen who would give their lives for ﷲAllahﷲ Or never get called Brother again or play csgo again

Oh yeah dude I listen to all genres of music except for
Adult contemporary
Arab pop
Baroque pop
Brill Building
Britpop
Bubblegum pop
Canción
Canzone
Chalga
Chanson
Christian pop
Classical crossover
Country pop
C-pop (Chinese popular music)
Hokkien pop
Mandopop
Dance-pop
Disco polo
Electropop
Europop
Austropop
Eurobeat
French pop
Italo dance
Italo disco
Laïkó
Latin pop
Nederpop
Russian pop
Fado
Folk pop
Iranian pop
Indie pop
J-pop (Japanese popular music)
Jangle pop
K-pop (Korean popular music)
Korean hip hop
Korean rock
T'ong guitar
Trot
Latin ballad
Louisiana swamp pop
Mexican pop
New Romantic
Operatic pop
Pop rap
Pop rock

It’s neither unprofessional nor inappropriate if you see my thong straps peeking through my out through my outfit

I have gigantic balls, they’re the first or second thing most people notice about me anyway. It is not a secret or a surprise that I have to wear a thong every day to keep these babies hoisted and professional. They are performance wear. It’s not like I’m letting some lacy nut cleavage peek out, or wearing an outfit to be intentionally provocative. So idgaf if you see my thong strap peeking out from my professional, khaki shorts when I’m at work. I wear them! Big ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ deal! It’s 100 degrees!

ETA: your “if you have big balls, prove it” comments aren’t cute or original. There’s plenty of balls on the internet for you to ogle.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to '♥♥♥♥' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to '♥♥♥♥' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.

Johnny, this is Tom from LA Fitness: we want you to know you are forever banned from our facilities. We understand you take your workout seriously, but what you and your "friends" did in the showers had no cardiovascular value. I know you said you were "working each others glutes", but we both know that's a lie. What you did with the curl bar was disgusting, and our staff is STILL trying to scrub lubricant and bodily fluids off the ceiling. We have added a "Johnny Alarm", don't return.

I'm depressed. Wanna know why? Because I try hard as ♥♥♥♥ to be nice to girls, help them, and just be friends and act natural around them, and I never even get spared a passing glance. I just want to be noticed and feel like i'm appreciated. People who are way less attractive and way more awkward than me still get laid. I'm like a little quiet, but i'm not even awkward, and I still get ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. Life is unfair. I just want to feel loved. maybe, just maybe, there's still someone out there for me that I just haven't found. Maybe i'm too impatient, and just am so lonely already in life that I haven't stopped to think if I should find someone that makes me happy no matter how/when I think of them. But...what if there isn't that person and i'm destined to die alone? That path, to me right now, seems like the more plausible one and that's why i'm depressed.

Look i know This is going to sound crazy, but i saw someone post THE same paragraph as mine just a minute ago On another person's steam profile. The odds of two people having the same paragraph-long thought is astronomical, especially on the world wide web of the internet !!. Wow. i'm absolutely blown, what are the ODDS right??? just thinking about it melts my brain haha, it's really mind boggling when these really rare things happen to you haha, i guess this is just another once in a lifetime experience to check off the list, i'll make sure to right down today's date and time just to make sure i remember this legendary moment of when someone thought of the exact long paragraph as mine on the internet :D !!!

This Profile made me Realize that life is is a characteristic that distinguishes physical entities that have biological processes, such as signaling and self-sustaining processes, from those that do not,either because such functions have ceased,or because they never had such functions and are classified as inanimate.Various forms of life exist, such as plants, animals,archaea,and bacteria.Biology is the science concerned with the study of life.There is currently no consensus regarding the definition of life.One popular definition is that organisms are open systems that maintain homeostasis, are composed of cells,have a life cycle,undergo metabolism,can grow,adapt to their environment,respond to stimuli, reproduce and evolve.However, several other definitions have been proposed, and there are some borderline cases of life,The prevailing scientific hypothesis is that the transition from non-living to living entities was not a single event, but a gradual process of increasing complexity

I'm not a boomer. I am not a boomer. Do not f ucking call me a boomer ever again. I am quite honestly one of the least boomer people you have ever met. I make jokes about depression, mad f ucking f ucked depression. I am not boomer. I am not a boomer. Stop saying I am a boomer. If you were a boomer, I would have probably already punched the s hit out of you by now, but fortunately you are a zoomer whose body remained un-touched by my fat, meaty, fists because I AM NOT A BOOMER. If I was a boomer though, you would find my Jackhammer pounding your face with my fists. Luckily for you, I am NOT A BOOMER, and you will have your virgin face remain unpounded ad infinitum. Actually, it seems to me like you are the boomer here. You are a boomer, not me. I am not a boomer, and I will never be. If I was ever a boomer in a past life (which I WASN'T), I would be killing myself right now, that is how boomer I AM NOT.
YOU STUPID PIECE OF MILLENIAL ♥♥♥♥

Second grade survival guide:

• second grade gets HARD. Stay on top of all your homework.

• in sexond grade you learn the hard $hit. Multiplication is no joke. may b get a tutor

• grammer and speling will kill you so practiece a lot

• dronk water

• study 40 hours a day

• dating gets real. this is the grade to get a serious boy/girlfriend. this isn’t 1st grade anymore. cooties aren’t a thing anymore.

• if u get a bad grade punch ur teacher in their crotch!

• 99.99% of people lose their virginity in 2nd grade. don’t get left behind

• girls: no more shopping at justice or baby gap anymore. shop at the real stores now. Like Victoria secret and brandy Melville

• guys: wear heelies to get all the hoes

• you should defiantly know where you wanna go to college at this point

• take all ap classes

• $hit your pants on the first day of school to assert your dominance

hey, sorry but i saw your profile and i just thought that you seemed really nice and looked and sounded kinda cute hehe. i just really wanted to tell you that. its really rare to see girls playing games hehe. i dont know why its a guy thing tbh like im really against misogyny and like ill be the one in the kitchen making sandwiches. We should really play L4D2 sometime. its a really cool zombie game with a lot of scary moments, but dont worry ill protect you ;) sorry that wasnt flirting i swear im just trying to be friendly i really like your profile picture sorry was that too far? really sorry im really shy i dont go out much haha add me on skype we should talk you look really nice and fun xxx

I blocked this douche 293 days ago, and decided to look through his profile comment... funny how some things dont change

rep After a good game in csgo, i added him because he seemed like a cool guy. We got chatting, over the next couple of months we became good friends. Lots of banter, lots of great CS and most importantly true friendship.
I invited him to my house for a csgo lan party. He said he was coming so i was looking forward to meeting him in real life.
When he arrived at my house, he pushed me against the wall and started nibbling my ear, i felt his hard ♥♥♥♥ push against my leg. I punched him and then 1 tapped him. Turns out he was gay. Don't trust this guy.

I am 13. Just my grandpa and I are staying down at his shack at the moment. I've been sleeping with no clothes on for the passed few nights because it feels better and my grandpa doesn't come into my room much, so he wouldn't know. But this morning I accidentally slept in so grandpa came in to wake me up. I had morning wood (an erection in the morning that is caused in your sleep) and I had kicked the covers off during the night so I was laying there naked, with a hard-on (how embaressing!!). Grandpa quickly went out of the room and we weren't talking because it was awkward. Then later on today I was wanking off in the bathroom (which doesn't have a lock) when I thought my grandpa was outside. He walked in just as I was ejaculating and groaning with orgasm. One day doesn't get much more embaressing than that!! How unlucky. My grandpa and I haven't talked for seven hours now. What should I say to him?

Listen here bud, quite frankly im tired of all this yappin you do in global chat. you better stop before i contact steam support, alright? i aint joking around either

offliner :( needed our kits

men

Listen here you little pile of human fecal matter ♥♥♥♥. I’m tired of you going around trying to make fun of people that have been sexually assaulted in their lives. I am johnny salami protector of woman, and I know that they are beautiful and amazing. NOW STOP IT THIS INSTANT OR I WILL GET INVOLVED!!! You also make fun of the black community. Not cool man. NOW STOP!!!!!!!!!! ——- johnny salami out

Yo goaty I tought you how to play rust you was just a cute 12 year old noob hiding in a massive wood base with spears when i befriended you

hey, i cant send you friend request, so can you add me please? its urgent

PGA TOUR GOD