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报告翻译问题

If you wouldn't mind being a pet of mine~
This room feels stuffy...
By the way do you like puppies?
HERES A BASKET OF PUPPIES!
Mother brains a woman but she gets respect!
Yea kraid, you never talk to me that way!
Oh god, I wonder if it's because your a huge disgusting brain!?
Is when enemies get nice when they all find out I'm a girl
So do me a favor and take your cakes and your pies
And shove them so far up your ass, that they end up behind your eyes.
XD