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⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠳⠶⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠓⠶⠞⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀its dah gingabwead man (he has a pipebomb :3)

Happy 🎊😄 christmukkah🎄🔯 to all you christmukKUNTS 💋💅 This year 🗓️ we shoved🫸🪠😩 TWO 👯2️⃣ celebrations 🕍⛪️ into ONE 1️⃣🕴️little 🎀🍼🔞 day so now 🚨⏰ let’s see 🫣👀 how many ☝️✌️thick🛢️🪘hot 🥵❤️‍🔥 DRIPPING💧🍯 candles 🕯️ you can fit 😣🧩 in the judah maccaBUSSY 🍑🥥 between your succulent 🤤🍖 snow globes 🔮🔮 Santa 🎅🦌 says 🧑‍⚖️ to trim ✂️💇 the tree 🌲 but keep the wreath 🦔🩲 nice 😋 and bushy 🌳🦍 and make sure 📝 the LABIA 🌮🦪 MENORAH 🕎 of your temPLUSSY 🕍🌮 is slick ⛲️🚿 with enough 🤑 lamp oil 🌊🪣 to last eight 8️⃣🎱 NOT SO SILENT 😩💥📢 nights🌛🌃 cause he needs to STUFF 🛍️🍗 your stocking

🧦🔥 with a fresh ♨️ batch 🧑‍🧑‍🧒‍🧒🚊of potato 🥔🍠 panCOCKs ©️🅾️©️ But REMEMBER ⚠️🚨 that whether you’re lubing 🧴🪣 up ⬆️🆙 for the FISTival 🤌🕳️ of lights 💡🔦 or sucking 🦟🧛 off jolly old 🏚️👴 st. ♥♥♥♥ 🍆🌽 you’d better keep the HOLE 🛟🍩 in holy day ⚔️🛐 and send 📤📫 this to your 12 1️⃣2️⃣ GAYS👨‍🎤🏳️‍🌈 of christmas 🎄 or else daddy 🧔‍♂️🫃won’t ⛔️ bring 🤲🧳 you 🫵 his figgy pudding 💦🍮‼️ And now we SING 🗣️🎼 Good 👍✅ tight 🤏things we briiiing 📥🎵 to you and your kiiiin 🧑👧🧒👦 good 👍✅ tight 🤏 things for COITUS 💏 and a happy NUDE🦶💪🦵yeEEeeEear 🎉🎇🥳2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣5️⃣

God I love the ford flex. Ever since the car set tread on the auto show stage, I instantly fell in love with the boxy and sleek proportions of the ford flex. I hung up posters in my room and had it as my wallpaper for weeks. I'd go to the ford dealer and take several pictures of the flexes in stock. However, one day my love for the flex got so immense that i just couldn't resist— whenever I saw a flex on the road or thought of one, I'd instantly become erect and started to mastrubate to that boxy beauty—l'd even go as far as fantasizing about sticking it in those wide exhaust pipes, l'll admit. My love for this beautiful piece of American engineering will always stand strong, through thick and thin.

PINGUPINGUPINGUPINGUPINGUPINGU

Once upon a time you decided to play the game Garry's Mod for the first time in a while. Since your favorite game mode was TTT, you hoped into a server called Carbon Castles. Little did you know, this one simple click would change your life forever.

On the server was a single user: their name, [CC] Danny.