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The (Un)Holy Order of the Pun the Holy Pun
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STEAM 组
The (Un)Holy Order of the Pun the Holy Pun
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2015 年 2 月 13 日
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Xtrashiny 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:43 
I bet at this point these puns are making you gwyn, or perhaps seath in anger.
Arthur's Great-Grandson 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:32 
I couldn't work out how to fasten my seatbelt. Then it clicked.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:32 
Warning: Incorrigible punster. Do not incorrige.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:31 
Why did the scarecrow get an an award?
He was out standing in his field
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:29 
Why did Robin Hood rob only the rich? ... Because the poor had no money.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:29 
Two peanuts walking down the street, one of them's a salted.
Arthur's Great-Grandson 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:29 
I went to Premature Ejaculators Anonymous but nobody was there.
I guess I came too soon.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:28 
Acupuncture: a jab well done.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:28 
Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:28 
A plateau is a high form of flattery.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:28 
A lot of money is tainted: 'Taint yours, and 'taint mine.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:28 
The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.
Arthur's Great-Grandson 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:28 
If Apple made a car, would it have Windows?
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:27 
Local Area Network in Australia : The LAN down under.
Arthur's Great-Grandson 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:27 
How does Moses make his tea?Hebrews it.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:27 
What kind of rocks are on the bottom of the Mississippi River? ... WET rocks.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:27 
What do you say to a Buddhist hot dog vendor?
"Make me one with everything."
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:27 
If a tree falls in a forest, and hits a mime, does anybody say anything about it?
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:26 
Sign on a door to a psychiatric ward: "Please do not disturb further."
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:26 
Sign on a parking space at a garden nursery: "Reserved for plant manager."
Arthur's Great-Grandson 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:26 
Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth, then it just becomes a soap opera.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:26 
Sign in a podiatrist's window: "Time wounds all heels."
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:26 
Impatient customer, sarcastically: "Waiter, do you serve crabs?"
"Sit down, sir - we serve anyone."
Arthur's Great-Grandson 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:25 
Thieves had broken into my house and stolen everything except my soap, shower gel, towels and deodorant. Dirty Bastards.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:25 
Why politicians don't enjoy the game of golf?
Because for them, it's too much like their work -- you know, being trapped in one bad lie after another.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:25 
Half of being smart is knowing what you're dumb at.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:25 
What do you call an unemployed jester? ... Nobody's fool.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:25 
Aibohphobia (def'n): An irrational fear of palindromes.
Arthur's Great-Grandson 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:25 
People who say they suffer from constipation are full of ♥♥♥♥.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:25 
What do you call a chicken crossing the road? ... Poultry in motion.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:24 
Says one psychiatrist to his colleague: "You are fine; how am I?"
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:24 
A girl phoned me and said, "Come on over, there's nobody home." I went over. Nobody was home.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:24 
Wife: Do you want dinner?
Husband: Sure, what are my choices?
Wife: Yes and no.
Arthur's Great-Grandson 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:24 
There was a man who sent ten different puns to friends, in
the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh.
Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:23 
Geometry holds clues for the meaning of life; look and you will see the sines.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:23 
Old bikes should be retired
Arthur's Great-Grandson 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:23 
A three legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He slides up to
the bar and announces: "I'm looking for the man who shot my paw."
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:23 
If a leopard could cook would he ever change his pots?
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:22 
See one melée of unruly people and you've seen a maul.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:22 
Do hungry time-travellers ever go back four seconds?
Arthur's Great-Grandson 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:22 
Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, but when they lit a fire in
the craft, it sank proving once again that you can't have your kayak and
heat it, too.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:21 
The days of the pocket diary are numbered.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:21 
Nuns generally wear plain colours because old habits never dye.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:21 
The carpenter's heavy tools were uncomfortable so he got a little sore.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:21 
Sports people can avoid the pain of defeat by wearing comfortable shoes.
Arthur's Great-Grandson 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:21 
Two boll weevils grew up in South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and
became a famous actor. The other stayed behind in the cotton fields and
never amounted to much. The second one, naturally, became known as the
lesser of two weevils.
Arthur's Great-Grandson 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:21 
Did you hear that NASA recently put a bunch of Holsteins into low earth
orbit? They called it the herd shot 'round the world.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:20 
Serious campers are intense.
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:20 
100% reliable contraception is inconceivable
MrBensonhurst 2015 年 4 月 26 日 下午 2:20 
A song about a fajita is usually a rap.