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报告翻译问题

PS: Never buys hats
But there was a option to see the next item.
And I clicked.
And I got Batter's Helm. The. single. Hat. I. Didnt. Want.
But batter's helm? Steam cloud was like: "well its about ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ time to give Destroyer a hat, lets give him the hat he hates most!"
BUT IM NO LONGER POOR AND IRISH AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA
farewell
I am struck with joy at my finding, and for this I head out to celebrate with my other hatted companions.
I wish the best of luck to you, and someday fortune shall avail you like it did with me.
Farewell,
Gentlemanne Lighting
This leaves me no choice but to forfeit my position as anonymous member of the P&A Tribe.
Farewell, and best of luck in your future discoveries. Perhaps, if I discover new artifacts myself, I might be able to support you materially.
Yours,
Ex-Poor and Irish Gentlemenne Ev I
*He walks off*
♥♥♥♥♥♥♥...
And with that I bid you good day. Perhaps one day you will grow as RICH and HAT-OWNING as me, and we shall have our servants duel. But for now, I must away to my newlybought secret mansion in my secret mountains.