JAN 13 @ 10:03PM - Gymboree Outlet Store - Detroit, Michigan
Cockring Gaming™ is excited to announce an upcoming merchandise drop, exclusive to Cockring Gaming™ members only. We will be dropping a variety of items, made from the finest leather in Italy, including ássless chaps, fedoras, ♥♥♥♥ and nut rings and more. Since Cockring Gaming™ members sign an NDA upon hire, are required to disclose their SSN, home address, and bank account, there is no need to pay, as the cost will be directly draft from your bank account. As CEO, trust me when I say this: These garments WILL allow you to hang at the chillest restaurants, get the hottest dudes, and become a true Sigma Male™.

Now, I know some of our members are also parents, and since we don't want to only corner the adult market, we are also dropping our first children's drag queen clothing line, Tike ♥♥♥♥♥♥™! Thanks to the Creative Director of our Childrenring Gaming subsidiary, Brian Shycroft Mossington (whomst is also the NY Times best seller "The Art of Closing the Deal") has brought this passion project and turned it into a reality and is projected to be our third most profitable brand and I.P..

As we prepare for our launch we want to give a few shoutouts to the people who enabled us to get this far.
Oliver O'Nigglet: Our Executive Director of Foreign Operations for our Green ♥♥♥ Gaming subsidiary based out of Ireland.
Brandon Fourskin: Our lawyer on retainer, we've used him for various lawsuits including the Dateline NBC - To Catch a Predator Chris Hansen sting where several of our employees were messaging their decoy and went to their house.
Abraham Cumstick: Our Managing Director of Financial, Accounting, Fiscal and Regional Expansion Operations who helped us land our new corporate headquarters in Skid Row Los Angeles.

Hello all,

As we are expanding into domestic and international markets following our acquisition by Amazon we are looking to hire new team members to perform and act under the Cockring Gaming umbrella.

We also want to apologize to all of our past employees who were recently let go following our bankruptcy - we know many of you left high ranking positions in top e-sports organizations including Faze, TSM, Cloud9 and many others with the promise of $5 million after 3 months in our organization, but unfortunately some poor financial decisions from our CFO and myself meant that you were let go before your first paycheck.

At this time we think it is best to not rebuild burnt bridges, therefore, will not be hiring any previous employees. We do apologize as the err was on us but we feel this is the best foot forward.

Below you will find a concise list of positions we need filled no later than Monday, 4/11. Salaries are negotiable.

- Call of Duty - Prop Hunt: Entry fragger
- Call of Duty - Prop Hunt: Data scientist
- Team Fortress 2: Medic main
- Fortnite: Utility specialist
- Non-Game Specific: Copy pasta creative director