So recently, I was bored so I made these two dumb kids from a bunch of mud. You can't believe how dumb they are, so naive they walk around naked in my garden, all day. So, ... anyway, I told these two POS, to never .. EVER... EVER eat from my fokken apples. Bro those are my apples. F those kids.

But I suspected these mf were eating my apples. So I've been spying on them, they're being all weird and naked in my garden. I saw them trying to talk to a dog, can you believe how dumb kids are? So then this known pdfile in our neighborhood sneaked into my garden. Not knowing I was observing from the upstairs windows. Idk, maybe I should have gone downstairs and warned the kids. Kicked the pdfile from my backyard. But ... I wanted to see what those dumb kids were going to do. I know they don't know sh, I've not thought them anything and they believe everyone in the world, esp everyone in my (aka "daddy's") garden is a good guy. But, I told these little brats that they weren't allowed to touch my apples. When I saw this pdfile mf take one of the apples of my trees, I was ENRAGED .. but I wanted to know what the dumb little twadongles would do, so I just waited and watched. Then this pdfile is all over my naked children and starts making them eat my apples and those DUMB kids DARED to bite into the apple, even though, I told them "NEVER to touch MYYYY apples, MINE!"

So you know me, I run downstairs, tell my PDFile neighbor to gtfo. After which I start SCREAMING at these little brats. how dare you eat my apples you mf. You know what? No more garden for you!

Kicked the little f's out of my home and dropped them in some forest somewhere. Can you believe that they're crying and begging to return "HAHAHA" as if. Dumb mf's. "Daddy it's cold out here, daddy Adam is sick, daddy my belly has grown" .. like I fkn care. Shouldn't have eaten from my TREE YOU LITTLE BIIII

AITA? The kids deserved it right? I feel like the only way I could ever, EVER forgive them is after they and their children suffer horrifically for thousands of years. Then, I might consider impregnating a 12 year old great, great, great, great grandchild with myself and committing sudoku to forgive them when I eventually grow up. Obviously .. not going to let them back in the garden yet.. maybe one day. Me and the PDFile neighbor of mine have a bet, I'm waiting to see who wins first.

Again, aren't I the very best? Wouldn't you worship me gang? F these kids right. F their kids too btw. All of them sinners. A bunch of them laughed at some bald dude I liked, so I had them mauled HAHAHA.. f kids man. Now worship me.